Have you eva online dated? BIG K SHADY PORC does

Have you eva online dated? BIG K SHADY PORC does

This is a little long, but it starts full throttle…start laughing NOW!!!

Seizure man

by menstrual_sweatpants_disco on Feb.19, 2009, under GhettoPhresh

Identity used for this conversation:

“GhettoPhresh”

Victim’s name:
BIGK SHADY PORC

Photo:

Message he sent me:
how are u doin,how was your day.are u involved with anybody are do u have a maqn and if u dont are u lookin for one.i just stop by to show u some luv.hit me bacc ok please,please,please,please,please,please,please,please.

My response:
niiga, you’s fine. how u do?

holla

Lakendra.

Him:
SO BEAUTIFUL CAN I GET 2 KNOW U AND AFTER I GET 2 KNOW U CAN I BE THE 1 4 U AFTER THAT IF ITS OK WITH U BEAUTIFUL

Me:
aight nicca, i give you’s a shot. so wut u into?

wats fresh?

Him:
NOTHING TRYING 2 GET 2 KNOW U IF ITS OK WITH U

SO BEAUTIFUL what’s ur name

where do u stay

hyow old r u

what type of man do u like

do u have any kids

what r ur like and dislike

do u have any tats r piercings

do u have a job r a car

r u a freak

do u wear thongs r g-strings

do u play with yourself dont get mad ok

do u have phone sex dont get mad ok.

u can ask me question 2 ok

hit me bacc please,please,please,please,please.

Me:
SO BEAUTIFUL what’s ur name
Lakendra

where do u stay
i’s ova in compton

hyow old r u
im how eva old u want me 2 bE lol!

what type of man do u like
depends!

do u have any kids
nope

what r ur like and dislike
i like grape soda and i hate tawkin in real English

do u have any tats r piercings
I have a Cephalotripsy tattoo right above mah bootie

r u a freak
hammock rodeo sauce

do u wear thongs r g-strings
both

do u play with yourself dont get mad ok
only when I’m droppin a deuce on tha john

do u have phone sex dont get mad ok.
yes

so tell me about urself, nicca?

<3

Him:

i am 23 but i am turnin 24 on april,9 i am a aries

i stay in gardena ca

i like a woman that not a cheaters and not a golddigger. like 2 have fun like 2 play video games like 2 hang out and go places somtimes are like 2 watch movies and talk about there problemes.

no kids

my dislike is golddiggers and chears ,liers

i have 6 tats and both side of my ear piercings

i dont have no car but i have a job but shit goin slow so i am lookin 4 new job

i drink but i dont smoke weed nomore its been 3 years since i stop

is there anything else u want 2 know.

I never responded. Several months pass before I start it up again.

Me:
Sup playa? Long time no tawk.

Him:
i just been thinking about and trying to see wats good with me and u i thik we will make a good couple what u think.

holla bac.

Me:
oooooo, u a sweet thang. Im up for givin it a shot. We shuld go out sumtime. wear u gonna take me? :)

Him:
WELL I CANT REALLY DRIVE R DO NOTHING YET CUZ I HAD A SUIZURE AT WORK

SO DO U WANT TO BE MY G/F YES,NO R MAYBE

Me:
mmmmmm I love suizures

Him:
why u love suizures

so wats good with me ad u

Me:
Theys has good food. my bitchass loves me sum spagetty. mmmmmMMMMMM yowyy kaZOWWY!

Him:
i mean to tell u i had a seizures on june 17th

Me:
ohhh, Im sorree to here dat. Did u not pay ur car payyments or sumthing?

Him:
here my cell its (310)704-xxxx call me r text me anytime k

Me:
I dont understand why u wont b mah boyfriend.

Him:
uz i can be that right man for that going to treat u right and be there for u

Me:
oh god, i dont understand why we cant be 2gether. why dont u lyke me?

Him:
i do like u cuz u r beautiful u seem like a can be a cool person 2 talk 2 ans its seem like we got somthing in common and i do want to be with the question is that do u want to be with me

Me:
i dooooooo want 2 b wit chu. soooo much! i jus dont no if i cans wait till u get outta prison. i am a woman and haves neeeeds

Him:
what the hell u told u i am in prison i am not in prison what is u talking about

Me:
i thot u said u was in prison? ur the one who told me. its ok if u r. i dont judge. we all make mistakes.

Him:
naw i said i cant drive ,smoke r drink cuz i had a seizures at work

do u know what a seizures is ha

Me:
it’s wen they takes stuff away frum u rite?

Him:
naw is when u fall out and be dizzy and dont know where u at

baby for the last time i am not in prison k

you r to beautiful 2 be single

u need a man that going to treat u right and be there for u and a man that is faithful to u like me and keep it real and a nice guy like me.and call and check up on u and lisen to ur problems and see how r u doing and is not all about sex and be with u for ur personlity.

Me:
so ifs u fall ova in prison all dizzy like, dont they steals ur stuff?

Him:
i am not in prison for the last time where r u getting this 4rm

Me:
I just don’t understand why you refuse to by my boyfriend.

Him:
so why u want me 2 be your boyfriend ha.holla bacc please,please,please,please

Me:
I want you inside of me while you’re having a seizure. I’m so fucking wet right now thinking about it.

Him:
so do u want to be my girlfriend yes r no and r u going to faithful 2 me

what do u have on right now

can i get ur cell phone number

can we have phone sex

Me:
mmmm. Right now all i havs on is a tight black thong & bra. and fishnet stalkings. I want u 2 tell me how u touch urself before i call u. :)

Him:
my big dcc is on super hard i will put my hand inside my boxer on grab my big dicc and go up and down on my big dicc and start playing with it

Him:
i want to be your boyfriend right now if its k with u

do u have myspace im

Him:
do u want to be my girlfriend

when r u going to be my girlfriend

why u dont want to be my girlfriend ha

This guy is out of his fucking mind.

Me:
mmmmm thats so hawt. Your bad grammar makes me soooo wet. Im touchin mah pussy right now. it feels so good. tell me more about ur big dicc…

Him:
WISHU CAN COME AND PLAY WITH THIS BIG DICC AND R START JACCING IT OFF R COME AND SIT AND RIDE THIS BIG DICC

CAN I PLAY WITH YOUR FAT PUSSY

Me:
ummmmm yes. I loev it whens u tawk dirty. i want 2 ride ur big dicc. wut will u do 2 me while im ridin u?

Him:
i want to have that rough sex and fucc u doggy style and choke u spank u and pull ur hair.kiss u and succ on ur tits and nipples and play with them

Me:
ohhhhhhhmygod yes! i loves it wen u talks dirty. i want u 2 play wit my dicc as yous has a seizure on me

Him:
you mean u want me 2 play with ur pussy that what u mean ha

so do u want to be my girlfriend yes r no.holla bacc please,please,please,please

Me:
uhhh, yes. My pussy. That’s what I mean. How foolish of me…

And yeaah, id luv 2 b ur girlfirnd :)

Him:
so we r girlfriend and boyfriend now and can i get your cell phone number if its k with u

Me:
I guess.

Him:
are u going to put me on ur top

here my cell phone number its 310-704-xxxx call me r text me anytime k

Me:
I want us to have sex NOW.

Him:
ok so what do u have on right now cuz im naked and my big dick is super hard i want to lick u up and down until u say stop i want to succ ur nipples and i want to play with ur fat pussy and have ruff sex and fucc u doggy style

Me:
OH GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDD YES, SLAP MY FAT PUSSY!

Him:
ok i will slap that faqt pussy

do u miss me and do u be thinking about me

Me:
I WAS thinking of you. I want to drink your AIDS so sexilly.

Him:
what was u thinking about and send me a pics of u in a thong

Me:
I want u 2 send me a pic first. i want 2 see u hard .

Him:
i dont have no cam

so please send me a pics r come and jack me off

Me:
YOU’RE A COP!

Him:
hll naw i am not a com

Me:
Can you prove it? sorry. I have to be sure if we’re going to meet up and have sex.

Him:
i dont have a cam on me and pluse look at my pics do i look like a damn cop.

Me:
sorry baby. u could be undacova. knocko maybe. im sorry 2 ask about dat stuff but I got in trouble once befo like dat. my fiance that i dated for 4 years turned out 2 be a knocko undacover. 1 night we were doin coke off of a toaster and he arrested me and the fbi stormed in and raped me.

Him:
hell naw im not the under cover .i dont either deal with them. so you be doing coke.

Me:
I havnt dun ne drugs in a long tyme. dat part of mah life i left behind. bein raped by cops still happens alot tho.

Him:
damn for real

Me:
Yeah. So when are we gonna fuck? We’ve been boyfriend & girlfriend for awhile now and my pussy’s goin dry. I need your big dicc in my fat pussy.

Him:
when ever i get better cuz im sicc right now

Me:
wut chu got? I want it too

Him:
i have a cold.talk dirty 2 me

Me:
I want to roll you in mud and rub motoroil into your taint.

Him:
OH OK WHAT ELSE

Me:
I’m gonna make u fix mah car and den not wash your hands and den make urself a sammwich. Maybe go joggin and not wear deodorant mmmmmmm

Him:
WHAT ELSE

Me:
Imma get a real sexy anteater and make it ticle your ass with its tongue. Then Imma smear goldfish crackers and chocolate milk all ova ur chest while I empty a hoover’s vaccum bag into your beard while I play with myself on my period.

FINALLY… he stopped responding.

Me:
I hope you had another seizure, you fucking fruitcake.

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